I have good days and I have bad days. Today has been a little of both. I didn’t sleep well at all overnight. I was really missing her next to me.
This was one of those days when I was thinking how much of a selfish bitch she is for abandoning the marriage. Sure, our marriage was far from traditional, but with all the compromises we had given each other, surely she could stay and work it out. But, I also know there are other things that have affected her judgment. I don’t think she realizes just how selfish she has become.
It’s been over 8 months since she said that the marriage was over, and now 5 1/2 months since she moved out of the house (and that means, of course, her lease is up).
Last time her lease was up, she decided instead of renewing, or moving to a new place that she would move back home. That is not an option this time, because right now, I’m not going to take her back. Even if she were to ask, I would say no, because she has made no effort to put any kind of a relationship together. I’m also at a point where I don’t know if I will try to ask her out. Oh, don’t get me wrong, I still love her very much, but I’m now starting to realize that she was not the be all end all that I thought she was. She’s been fairly selfish for a long time, and I was just too blind to see it.
Okay, I’m done writing for the day. Time to take the motorcycle out for a ride! Be safe and careful out there, and I’ll see you again soon!
And if you enjoy these writings, drop me a comment.